New Moon

No, I am not a fan. No, I have not read any of the books. Why do I go? I suppose you can chalk it up to curiosity. It's like the third grossing movie ever...so I must go see what everyone is talking about. True to the predecessor, this one felt like a Lifetime movie of the week;/

Here are my givens:

-I get it...Edward Cullen is hot.
-I get it...Jacob/The Wolf Pack have rock star abs!
-In high school, 18 is old.
-Everyone was cast for their looks and not their acting ability.
-It rains a lot in Forks.
-Bella's Dad has no clue.

Now then...I hear a lot about "Team Edward" vs "Team Jacob"...let's break that down a bit...I know she's gonna end up with Edward (who doesn't) That said, if I was Bella, who would I choose? I hate to tell you this, but as a girl who's cold all. the. time...Jacob had me at "180 degrees right here" (wolves blood runs hot). I think I'd go for a warm live dude with rocking abs, over a cold dead guy with a really skinny body, any day of the week. (Sorry)

Seriously, what do the vampires have going for them? Hmmm...well, they wear fabulous shoes. (Was I the only one who noticed this?) I'll go ya one further, those vampires dress pretty darn well. I was digging on the head Vulture guy. His pants tapered really nice, with his Euro Johnny shoes (I am kind of a sucker for that look). Give that V'ture guy a hair cut, and tell him to stop breathing into his hands all the time, and you might have something there...

Cons on Jacob...I wasn't really feeling The Wolf Pack. They were cool as long as they stayed really big wolves, but when they turned into dudes, they were ridiculous. The whole, no shirt cut off shorts thing was way to Hulk for my taste. If you over think that...where the heck do their pants go? I gotta say, the whole theater cracked up when Bella runs her bike into the rock, starts bleeding, so Jacob whips off his shirt to dab the blood away..."Hello abs..."

It was like eating cotton candy...good for a while, then you get sick of it:P Perhaps there were just too many long emotional pauses for my taste? Perhaps cloud of dust Edward was just this side of too corny? Perhaps the whole idea of a dude who is 104 years old finding his soul-mate in an 18 year old girl, is more creepy than romantic? Pick one...it's all there.

That said...I walked away thinking two things...."I can't wait to see how the Twilight Bunnies will handle New Moon", and "Damned if I won't go see then next one...I'm such a sucker..."

18 comments

  1. "I think I'd go for a warm live dude with rocking abs" made me LOL! I'm always cold too, so he got me on that line as well.

    And the hulk pants bugged me too. In the books I have to say the Wolf Pack makes a lot more sense. It's disjointed and more ridiculous somehow in the movie.

    Also, when I saw it (the late showing, I got home at 1:30 am!) and Jacob took his shirt off to wipe up that blood, everyone screamed. (Good screams, not bad screams). I tweeted later that even the guys sort of gasped. I mean, wow.

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  2. Feel asleep during the first one, no desire to see this one until I read this. I want to see how bad it is. My gf, no Twilight fanatic, loved it... new gf perhaps... never lol..

    I seem to have lost you on my reader list. Rejoined and hope it works.. misse your blogs. Off to catch up

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  3. I'll be honest, I did not get the first one at all and was going to pass on this. But you've made it sound like something I need to check out. Just for curiosity's sake.

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  4. Okay, I confess...I have no interest in the Twilight series, books or movies.

    Okay, I'm still here. Lightening did not strike me for admitting that.)

    There are so many other things I'd rather read. Like blogs. :-)

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  5. I used to be the girl who would roll her eyes every time the work "Twilight" was mentioned. I hated hearing about it, would never EVER consider reading the books, and had no intention of ever seeing the stupid vampire movie.
    Then, one night, I caught Twilight on TV, and I started watching... and suddenly... I loved it, bad acting and all... I was smitten... in love... I GOT it! I fell for it! The next day, off I went to buy all the books and I have not been able to put them down since... I'm almost done Eclipse now... and I saw New Moon this weekend, of course - what can I say? I FREAKING LOVED NEW MOON! I heard it wasn't so great, so I wasn't expecting that much, but it was so much better than I thought it was going to be! SIGH SIGH SIGH... Bella is one heck of a lucky girl, IMO! I love Edward... and Jacob, God, who wouldn't want him as a best friend/possible lover? I thought, really, don't make fun of me - that the acting was good! Especially Kristin Stewart - I think she's so raw and so real!!! I can't wait to see the rest of the movies!!! GAH I'm like a 16 year old again!!!

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  6. I'll see it when it's out of theatres, just because. I'm not much of a fan, either. Although I do happen to find vampires hot.

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  7. I am a huge Twilight Series fan. Having said that, I saw New Moon on Friday and didn't love it. I didn't expect to, though. I like the books, but the movies take away the magic. I could look at Edward (and now Jacob's abs) with no volume and think the movies are wonderful. The acting, the makeup. Yuck. But, I still love it...I guess it's that vampire scent...just sucks me in...

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  8. I can't wait to go see it! I know the acting is mediocre at best, but the love story is awesome! I've read all the books and have to say they are better. As for Team E or Team J, they both have qualities that draw me in Edward with his aloofness and bad boy image (I'm with you on the cold thing though wouldn't like that). Jacob with his sort of pureness and want to protect and keep bella safe. Eee I feel cougar-ish but they didn't make 'em like that when I was younger. lol Yummy!

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  9. Well, I have a weakness for a few things:

    1. Native American men. Holy hell. I watched Last of the Mohicans about 10 times at the dollar movies with my best friend in high school.

    2. Men who are alive. You know, blood that is his own? That is incredibly sexy to me. Call me crazy!

    3. Did I mention that Native American men are a serious weakness for me? And that boy (he IS a boy, isn't he! I AM OLD. He is a BABY. THIS IS WRONG.) is fah-reaking gorgeous.

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  10. Oh, I think the world knows I am no fan of this series, and I only watched the first movie when my husband (!!!!) rented it, but I spent the majority of the time watching it with a look on my face that is the same one I make when I encounter a horrid smell.

    All that said, though, I KNOW I'm going to end up renting this one (if my husband doesn't first...ha!) when it comes out on DVD in the spring and knowing that makes me feel dirty.

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  11. My daughter who is 13 told me there are no words to describe it because it was that good. She is on the team Jacob.

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  12. I haven't seen the movie yet, but I LOVE your reivew! I read Twilight. Didn't care for it. I'm not a "mushy gushy" kinda gal, especially not when they're 17 and have known each other for what, 12 hours, and they can't live without each other!? WTH!? Anyway, much to my daughter's and step-daughter's chagrin, I have no desire to read the rest of the series and won't because I love to read and have too many other worthier choices, and I will only see the movie when I am coerced, which I'm sure i will be. Taylor Lautner is pretty hot, but I could be his mom! And Robert Pattinson was much hotter as Cedric Diggory. The vampire thing is so not working for me. Skinny, pale, cold. Nah. Besides, I want my vampires to be VAMPIRES if ya know what I mean!

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  13. I can't believe you saw it. I can't believe I'm the only one out of my real like friends who isn't obsessed. What has the world come to?

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  14. Ha! I agree with you... to a point. I mean, I know the books and the movies are the cinematic version of Britney Spears, but I can't look away!!

    And I was the only one who cackled out loud, in the theatre I was at, when Jacob took off his shirt. It was so funny!! I may have also muttered Sheesh! Why'd they make him wear a shirt for the rest of the movie??

    All that said... I'd take the fancy-pants vampires over the adolescent werewolves.

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  15. I read the books last year before the first movie came out. Liked them, didn't love them. Stephenie Meyer is a decent storyteller, but great literature it is not. SO many people raved about them, though, that I slogged through all four books. And then I saw Twilight. Which ranks up there for me as one of the WORST movies ever. The acting was terrible, the special effects were film school bad, and I felt that all but one or two characters were seriously miscast.

    Despite all of this, I decided to go see New Moon this weekend. And while it will not make it into my top ten faves, it was so much better than Twilight, that I will actually call it good. I still feel the actors aren't right for the roles and oh.my.god. when Edward took off his shirt, my BFF and I gasped because he was sooo scary looking. Like concentration camp survivor scary. THAT? Is sexy? Not for me, thanks. I'll take the hunky jailbait any day.

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  16. I am slightly ashamed to admit that I did read the books (what? me and 70 other millions idiots) and no, they are not any better than the movies. Semi-exciting plotline, ridiculous dialogue. I haven't seen New Moon yet but since I'm a glutton for punishment, plan to go this weekend. I thought the first movie was AWFUL, maybe this one will be a little better??

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  17. I guess I'm just corny cause I like it! Romance stories sort of bore me usually, and I thought I'd hate New Moon, but when I went to see it with my little sis (she's 14)I found myself enjoying it! Weird...

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