Horse Thieving 101

Have you heard about this idiot hockey player Kane? Let me tell you...it's ALL the Chicago news can talk about.

Here's the deal 20 year old kid inks a deal for $875,00 a year to play hockey for the Blackhawks. (sweet dough, right?) Idiot was with his cousin in a cab in Buffalo around 4 am. Fare is 13.80, and they decide to beat up the cabbie since he didn't have the 20 cents change. Stupid. Stupid. Stoopid!

Here's the thing...it's not about the money ('cause even a $1.20 tip would have been cheap). When I first heard about it...I was all...

"I hate these entitled, spoiled rich athletes, who think they have no rules because they can dunk a puck through a goalpost with a bat!"

"I'm sick of it!"

"Way to ruin your NikeConverseUnderArmourWheaties sponsorship palie pal!"

Then I thought a little more (while I was pushing kiddos in the stroller...yes, that's all I do)...

I know EXACTLY the comment my mother would leave if I ended the post here. See...it's not about the money. It's about being 20 something...and bad decision making.


Would you like to see what the headline would have been had I...a) been famous and b) been caught?
(yes, this is the actual picture of my drunken a** on the fiberglass horse, I'm in front)
Yeah...this was my 19-20something bad decision (which seemed perfectly sane at the time of the crime).

I and a few friends drove to Boulder for quarter pitcher night (yes, quarter pitchers...nothing good can come of that). On the way home, we passed a horse ranch. I have no idea why, but next thing I knew...my denim mini skirt was hiked up around my waist, and I was shimmying up a pole with a ratchet in my back pocket.

Yes...we stole a life sized fiberglass horse! I have no excuse for this (other than pitchers being 25 cents, seriously who's idea was that?)...and thank the Good Lord that we were not caught. 'Cause horse thieving is a crime...even if it's fiberglass:P

Now...I kinda feel sorry for this poor schlep Kane (not too sorry, I still think he's an idiot). Who didn't make bad decisions at 20? I cringe at the messes I might have gotten in had I had a million bucks in my pocket.

*edited to add...Yes, I think beating up a person is WAY worse than stealing a fiberglass horse. My point here is, I don't blame the million dollar sports contract. I think it is the age that is in charge of the bad decision making. This young man beat up another individual, and should be punished to the full extent of the law.

23 comments

  1. Yee ha!

    While I have no doubt you really pissed off the owner of that horse, I still think yours was hands down the more spirited and harmless act.

    20 year olds should not be walking around with a million dollars in their pocket.

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  2. LOL! That sure is a crazy front page photo to remind you of your 20something decision making.

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  3. oh my nap warden !!! that is very naughty of you !!

    i often say thank god there was no cell phones to document my college years or post college years.....it would NOT be pretty.

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  4. I was a bit crazy at 20 myself. Hubby and his buddies stole grills for fun. How awful is that.

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  5. Oh yeah but hell, there's bad decisions at 20, and then there's violence.... not the same, no?

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  6. And finally I got my sorry arse (that's English for ass :), around to following you.....damn, I'm fast...not!!

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  7. Braja...I agree completely. Violence at any age is completely unaccebtable.

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  8. Such a good point. (Although I will argue that what the athlete you're talking about did is WAY WAY WORSE!!!) I read Britney Spears' mom's autobiography last year, and I've never looked at the crazy antics of the rich and famous quite the same.

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  9. Okay I'm laughing at your story about you stealing that horse! So great that you have picture proof, too! Too funny!
    Now about that idiot hockey player - it's not only that he's 20, but that he is a rich hockey player. Trust me, the ego gets to them young. I'm disgusted that he did that, and I hope he doesn't get to play hockey for a really long time. Loser.

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  10. Oh geez! That photo is so classic :)

    And yes, 20-something decision making skills are SO lacking and distorted at that age.

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  11. stupid is as stupid does... uhmmm the name Vick keeps ringing in my head for some reason. Great post.. Great one yesterday too ;-)

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  12. LMAO let's hope said ranch owner never stumbles across your blog. :-) I agree it's an age thing, but how silly to lose $875,000 over $1 something. I don't think it would've caught traction in the media if he was an average Joe!

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  13. Bad decisions at 20 never... does marriage count lol
    xx

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  14. followed you from VM...love your blog...and for some reason that horse stealin' episode is clanging something in my head.....hmmmmmm I wonder if I read about it somewhere waaaay back then??? i was at CU a few decades ago and I too am on the slippery side of 45....

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  15. Wow... my 20's... I'd never go back!! Well... maybe I'd go back into my 20 yr old body... but that's it.

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  16. LOL... Was that headline for real??? I'll never think about you the same, Cyn. You are a woman with a past.

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  17. In high school we stole political/election signs from every lawn we saw and then stuck them in the lawn of whichever friend opted to not go out with us that night. If it was outside of election season, then that meant it was probably construction season, so saw-horses, polycones, and constructions signs and tape were found in the "offender's" lawn instead.

    I do have to ask, though, if that hockey kid hadn't been offered such a lucrative contract, would he have thought he was made of teflon? I sometimes wonder if that kind of money makes people a little more cocky than they might already be...

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  18. I just don't see how, in this day and age, rich spoiled talented indulged kids don't get it. This lesson has been learned ad nauseum.

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  19. Amen to that. Young people are stupid. Which is why I could never run for office, god knows someone would dig up some of the ridiculous stuff I did back in the day. For the record: I did inhale, but I'm not proud of it.

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  20. PS - I am such an old fuddy duddy. "Young people are stupid."!

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  21. I officially have a crush on you. Officially.

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  22. Oh my, that is funny! Yes, the brain of a young 20 something can be a little off. Besides the usual road construction signs and cones, a group of us girls decided we wanted one of the reflector things that they stick in the yellow lines of the roads (not the round plastic ones, but the rubbery flap like ones). Boy was that fun trying to explain to the officer why we were all hunched over the center line. No worries about traffic it was a late night in Montana. All we had to worry about were wayward cows. LOL.

    I love the horse story! That just cracks me up.

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