11.15.2009

2012

So, I went to see 2012 this weekend.

Here's a little known fact about me...I love me some destruction of monuments in movie form. The Day After Tomorrow, I won't even tell you how many times I've seen this movie (no really, I'm not going to tell you...no, so don't ask) I don't know what that says about me...but like, the first time I saw the trailer for 2012...I was SO in.

First, I'm gonna come out right here and now and admit it to you...John Cusack, doesn't really do it for me:/ Having said that...I'll give him Say Anything, I'll even give him High Fidelity (who wouldn't go after him in these movies?) Heck, I'll be a super sport and give him Must Love Dogs...other than that...meh, he's just not my type. So, while I rooted for him...I was WAY more into Dennis Quaid in The Day After Tom. What can I say...John Cusack, I'm just not that into you;/

You get the vibe that I really wanted to love this movie, right? I can only give it a C (I can't even give it a C+) It's like Roland Emmerich went to some Hollywood disaster movie garage sale, and smashed it all together to make this disaster movie mush. For a while I was watching The Day After Tom., then I was watching some Independence Day...about the time we should be wrapping it up, I found myself elbow deep in The Poseidon Adventure. (For the love of God, this movie was 2 hours and 40 min. long!)

Some of the highlights...I loved me some Woody Harrelson (I swear, I had a tennis coach who was just like his character...yes, that is scary!) What else...on yeah, if you're a dog, and you're in one of these end-o-the world flicks...it's a pretty safe bet you're gonna make it;) If you're the guy dating the chick of the hero...you are so toast:( Would it have killed them to let Sasha and his little Russian hussy live? Couldn't he have just hustled out of the plane when it stopped for moment? Nope...OK.

Can we just once and for all agree that you can NOT out run an explosion? Can we? No...OK. What about agreeing that you can NOT out drive the earth as it crumbles beneath your car? No...OK. Oh, I know...you can NOT fly a plane if you run out of runway because the earth is disintegrating? No...OK. I got it...let's agree that no matter how fast you run or drive, there is NO outrunning a hundred foot wave crashing towards you? NO...sheesh!

I literally left this movie with a headache. Three of the four people I saw it with wanted to go knock on Ebert's door and punch him in the face (No, we didn't really want to punch him in the face...just metaphorically, you know, 'cause he gave it 3 1/2 stars. Really Ebert? 3 1/2 stars?!?)

I know it made a TON of money, and got some good reviews...but in this disaster movie fan's opinion...it's a pass. Wait 'til next week, and go see New Moon;)
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23 comments:

  1. Wasn't tempted by it before (kind of a wimp when it comes to destruction and fear) even though I am a fan of John Cusack. Thanks for the review!
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  2. I'm afraid of seeing this movie. I won't be able to sleep until 2013.
    I will take your advice and see New Moon! Can't wait!
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  3. Almost three hours?! What the hell?! I thought I'd seen the bulk of the whole movie from the commercials and the one clip every damn actor in the movie has to show when they've been on talk shows this past week! What more could there possibly be to it?!

    You know what worries me about John Cusack? I mean aside from how odd his hair is looking these days? It's his career choices.

    I'll be saving my money and not seeing this. Or New Moon. Yeah, I know...
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  4. That's a LONG movie! Haven't seen it and probably won't until it comes out on video as theaters are not my thing with 3 kids and a tight budget. Plus, I'd choose a movie like MJ or Precious first, so I probably wont be seeing this anytime soon! But I too have watched the day after tomorrow way to many times. Independence day too, cause I love Will Smith!
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  5. I have no babysitter or money for movies right now. But good to know so I won't even be tempted!
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  6. You had me at 2hrs40mins. There is no reason for a movie to be that long!! Not that I was particularly interested anyway but thanks for what sounds like a sound review! Ebert drives me nuts! He loooooooves everything!
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  7. This doesn't sound good.....I was so looking forward to the movie. I'm still going to watch it but at least my expectations might be more down to earth now after your post.
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  8. I am NOT into these destruction movies but my husband really is. He has gone and on about wanting to see this movie... And his dreams finally came true this weekend when he got to go. Seriously, the excitement he displayed was nothing short of child like...
    but his dreams actually didn't come true because he came home saying "I feel like I've seen this before..." and he went on (and on) about that fact...
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  9. That movie is WAY too long for me. I really didn't have a desire to see it. Thanks for the review.
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  10. That was halarious!! You should review movies. At least review every one you watch here for us!
    My favorite was, "....if you're a dog, and you're in one of these end-o-the world flicks...it's a pretty safe bet you're gonna make it"
    ;D
    Of course we all flash to the yellow lab in Independence Day. In fact, I flashed to about 3 different movies during your description, so I'm glad to hear all of this before wasting money-it sounds like exactly the kind of movie that would leave me angry and annoyed.

    And I've never understood how people watch a movie that long in a theatre. That kind of commitment is serious. When I see people walking into a theatre of a movie that long, all I can do is stand up strait as they pass me, nod and give them a "flared-nostriled-thumbs-up" along with my admiration while I wonder how long it will be before it's out in Blockbuster.
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  11. Yeah, I heard that the movie was pretty silly. The preview alone drove me nuts...how can a LIMO not get hit by falling buildings/glass/cars flying through the air, etc...

    As for New Moon, I'm renting it. I cannot sit through it with a bunch of screaming teenagers. I'd probably shout, "SHUT THE F UP!" and get kicked out. But hey, I'm not about to fork over 8 bucks to hear horny women moan over yucky Edward.
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  12. I was thinking of trying to be a good wife and suggesting a date this weekend to see this movie with the husband. Thank you for not making me lose a trainload of money on this!
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  13. You are great with the movie reviews! Seriously, I feel like you give us the honest scoop.
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  14. I wasn't really interested in this movie, although I LOVE John Cusack and am a huge disaster movie fan. But it's been getting some good reviews, so I figured, maybe I would. Now I'm rethinking that. It may be a wait for DVD kind of flick.
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  15. I've heard not so good things about it. I like John Cusack and I like action movies but I think I'll wait to see this one on DVD.
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  16. I adore John Cusack -- may I offer Gross Pointe Blank for your consideration?
    I am glad to have some ammo to convince J. (a true devotee of the disaster genre -- we watch Independence Day on average once a month) that we do NOT need to watch this, even on Pay Per View.
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  17. Luckily my husband isn't into this movie, so I can easily pass on it. I agree with the other comment about Independence Day. It has one of the best movie lines of all time. When the advisor is explaining to the president why no one told him about the alien research and the advisor says, "Plausible deniability sir." It's a very useful line.
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  18. I have to admit, I love John Cusack. Definitely my type :) But after your review, I'll surely wait until DVD.
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  19. I like John Cusack, but was thinking that movie probably wouldn't be a four star-er.
    Thanks for the review...sounds like maybe a netflix rental.
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  20. This is definitely not my kind of movie. The commercials are enough.
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  21. thanks for the review. I am such a wimp with movies like this - Day after Tomorrow shattered me for WEEKS, so I definitely won't see this one. Besides, when I saw Jennifer Garner talking about all the green screen effects, I was even more turned off....give me a real setting, a real time and place any day, over a computer generated graphic!
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  22. Thanks, I love your movie reviews.. are they all commedies? Did you see John Cusack in Gross Point Blank.. very good.. and he is a cutie.
    xx
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  23. I just DVRed the Day After Tomorrow - hoping to get to see it this weekend and once 2012 hits cable - i will do that one as well (hee he e- I don't get out much)
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