Elegant Dinner Conversation

The Little Man, Miss Peach, Husband and I are all sitting around the dinner table gorging ourselves on Domino's Pizza (thanks to a kitchen with no fridge or freezer).

Miss Peach stands up in her chair and toots (you know...she lets on rip)

Miss Peach: "Mommy, what is a fart?"

Mommy: "Ask your Daddy."

Miss Peach: "Daddy, what is a fart?"

Husband: "A fart is a sound your butt makes." (followed by giggles all around)

Miss Peach: "Daddy, do you fart?"

Husband: "Yes, I do." (more giggles all around)

Miss Peach: "Does farting make you happy?" (giggles, giggles, and more giggles)

Husband: "Yes, it does....Does it make you happy?"

Miss Peach: "Yes, it does....Mommy, do you fart?"

Mommy: "No, I don't."

Miss Peach: "Mommy, does that make you sad?" (The Little Man and Miss Peach are all but rolling on the floor at this point)

Me: "I am so done with this conversation."

What do you expect from dinner with toddlers:P
Congratulations to Megryan's Mom who won the Sesame Street Live tickets!


  1. Haha... oh yes, dinner conversation (or all day, for that matter) with toddlers are very entertaining and always hilarious! It's so great to keep a record of what they say at this age! So funny!

  2. "Does that make you sad" -- what a sweet fart comment. I think.

    Love that you completely denied it.

  3. nothing else. That is exactly what I would expect

  4. We had a similar conversation recently:

    Kid 1: Does everyone fart?

    Dad: Yes.

    Kid 2: Not Mommy! Mommy never farts!

    Kid 1: Mommy, how come you never fart?

    Mom: Because I have couth.

  5. Potty talk is the bane of my existence lately. That is nothing quite so nice as a boy walking in to a room and yelling POOP at the top of his lungs. 50 times a day. Love that!

  6. LOL!! Farting is a favourite topic here. It makes EVERYBODY happy :)

  7. Fart is the word of the week around here too. What is so captivating about the word???? My boys say it over and over and over again no matter how many times I explain it's "not nice".

    My sister taught her daughter to say "fluffy" so when the little girl toots she tells her mommy, "I did a fluffy" :)

  8. "Better out then in, that's what I always say."Shrek is a wise man.

  9. You are such a liar! I know you fart. I just know it!

  10. HAHAHA!!!! That sounds SO MUCH like the conversations at my house. Except that thanks to this pregnancy I couldn't answer "no, I don't" anymore. Oops. ;)

  11. Srsly why is farting universally funny? My toddler just learned what it is and thinks its hilarious.

  12. Sending one 3 yr old your way......our conversation Monday night...

    Mema you make beans for dinner? I like beans they make me fart.

    I give up! If it's not farts, it's butt crack or dupie crack or belching. He'll be the 1st child suspended from preschool.

  13. It may not be elegant but it still beats knock knock jokes at the dinner table.

  14. So funny. Growing up saying fart was a naughty word we weren't allowed to say. I'm still not sure why.

  15. One of Z's favorite sayings is "Dada TOOTS!" He cracks himself up when I'm trying to get him to go to sleep. Sigh. At least I'm not alone!

  16. OH yes, the fart conversations. I deny it, too. No one can prove differently, except during that one pregnancy........ But those were the baby. I swear!

  17. LOL! My kids think that mommies dont pass gas! I like it that way!

  18. A perfect commercial for Beano...

  19. cute - but my kids are NOT allowed to "toot" at the table! Big no no from momma

  20. So, you're trying to tell me that your young children are endlessly amused by even the word "butt"? How can this be?

    Good call on flatly denying your natural flatulence. As a lady, you don't want that one coming up at an inopportune time.

    But be warned, it WILL come back to bite you big time as they become more and more fascinated with the concept of your supposed exceptionalism. And God help you if you do ever let one slip around them.

  21. That's the funniest post I've read all day. Thanks I needed that!

  22. My 4 year old just told me last night that she can't wait to teach the new baby how to "toot"... oh yes, I'm so proud!

    BTW - as a 9 month pregnant lady I'm quite gassy - and my girls think it's the funniest thing in the entire world when I toot. I have no problem doing it in front of them - but I was quite mortified when I did it in the kitchen in front of my husband... thankfully my back was towards everyone and they couldn't see my face turning red!

  23. I haven't read the comments...but seriously, napwarden....you really should considering tooting. It keeps your belly from hurting.


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