Monsters

Why does it seem like I am the only one with toddlers that are completely against whatever it is we are doing? Seriously, I had one of those "I am selling my kiddos on eBay" days:P What a horrible Mother I am, right? I took my kiddos to the zoo...bad Mommy! You would think I was dragging them to get their teeth drilled.
Don't even consider holding hands. I kid you not, Miss Peach actually tries to beat on my hand until I "LET GO!". Really, is it so wrong to hold your child's hand? I must be a monster! God forbid I should actually let go of Miss Peach's or The Little Man's hand...They are off like a shot. No looking back, no stopping, just off and running. Let me tell ya, Miss Peach is her Mommies daughter. She is a fast little bugger!
So, we spent about an hour at the zoo. Then we spent about 20 min. splashing at the fountain outside the zoo. Mean old Mommy, letting her kiddos play. Then, it was time to go home for lunchies. I hate when kiddos pull the "my feet don't work" card! I hate it!
Both of them went limp. I can not physically carry the team home. It is just not possible. Fine, I drag them screaming across the park. Finally, they get up and walk...finally! As this whole scene plays out, everyone else is having a perfectly lovely time at the zoo/park. Children are listening to their parents, holding their hands, happily obeying their caregiver. While I am in the middle of some "how not to parent" documentary:P Ugh, I was just disgusted...plllllt!
It can't just be me. I can not be the only one raising sweet, adorable, complete monsters! It just always seems that way when the sh*t is hitting the fan...I just feel doomed, they outnumber me!

41 comments

  1. These are the days when you wonder what on earth you were thinking when you turned to your husband one starry night and said "let's have kids."

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  2. Surely the good kids were only a dream. My own sweet, darling 9 year old, would have acted more like a real kid. You know acting out, crying, slapping my hand, screaming at me for touching her, be embarrassed that I was anywhere near her, you know a normal kid!

    I offer relief..... You are not the only one raising a monster or two! heh!!

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  3. Oooh - been having a series of days like this myself lately! The older boy seems to be going through a highly emotional stage and the little boy is in the "I must copy everything the big boy does" stage. Oy vey...must they REALLY both cry for no reason at the same time?!?

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  4. Our lovely 9 year-old today missed the bus. She just wasn't ready to face the morning.

    Our 5 year-old sprayed the $500 decorative tree in front of our house with sunscreen. (You know, that stuff really works. Water won't take it off...go figure!?)

    Why do you roll over in the middle of the night and say that anyways? Not like the guys are really thinking about planting seeds. Geez. How complicated do you think we are? If you told us we were guaranteed a little...I've overstepped decorum. Sorry.

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  5. When it's your own kids' shit hitting the fan, it smells worse and sounds louder to you than anyone else's child throwing a tantrum. There were most DEFINITELY other tantrums and naughty children there. You were just too busy with your own darlings to notice them!

    Hope the next trip out is a better one!

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  6. I turned my head for a few minutes yesterday - my daughter peed on the floor (she's been potty trained for 6 months), cut up the last page of a book, colored her hand in blue - and then touched the couch, the wall, her shirt, and her face.

    I'll go in with you on a two'fer on eBay? We can make it a Buy It Now for $19.95.

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  7. I'm sorry you had one of those days.
    My son is alternating between not wanting to hold my hand when I need him to to refusing to let go when I really really need my hand back.

    I'm sure yours aren't the only sweet monsters around. In fact, I'm starting to think that maybe all little kids are just monsters in disguise. Especially in front of other parents!

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  8. Oh I've dragged a screaming/crying Quinn out of the zoo many times. And once someone looked at me and said, "oh, must be naptime?" I wanted to slap her.

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  9. You are soooo not the only one. Mark is going through a similar period right now. He drives me crazy some days. What really stinks is he only does it to me. When his father is around he is an angel. Drives me nuts.
    I get so embarrased when he does it in public. Other people look at you like their kids have never done it before.
    Hope it gets better.

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  10. frass says NO NO LET ME DO. hours before she will get in the car, hours before in her car seat, hours before she is buckled... fun stuff

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  11. There are just those days! Even the most well behaved children have days when they just don't want to do anything you ask. Miss Missy is usually and angel in public, but there are those days when even the mom stare doesn't dent the surface of her misbehaving. I usually say that leashes should only be for dogs, but when you have 2 of them, those little kiddie leashes are a God-send!

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  12. Monster indeed! I had the nerve to ask Cooper to hold my hand crossing the street yesterday - when hitting my hand to make me let go didn't work, he leaned over and bit me. Hope things get better soon . . . they have to, right?!

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  13. It always seems taht when your kids are rotten all the other kids are perfect. Just remember EVERYONE has those days. Harder with two I am sure.. I am just holding my breath!

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  14. Not much more to add. Been there, done that! Sorry you had a bad day!

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  15. And if anyone makes a comment as your former child/current screaming limp noodle is being removed from the situation do what I do, mutter very loudly "Well, that's really helping the situation now isn't it?"

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  16. you see at least you tried to take them somewhere besides Wal-mart. So you are not a bad mom...

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  17. I totally get it! I have seven and the fan is always on and the sh** it always flying. We just need to figure out how to get out of the way!!:)

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  18. Discovering your blog and, sorry, but I laughed reading this post! I could have written it a few years ago ;-) Courage!

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  19. "Miss Peach is her Mommies daughter. She is a fast little bugger!" I sure bet she is!

    Today I took my son to the mall. Everything was going great for a while, and then suddenly for no reason that I can tell, he got out of his stroller and started hiding in the clothing in Gymboree. So I left, carrying him in one arm and pushing the stroller with the other while he screamed. I'm sure everyone in the mall that I was some child abuser.

    Rambunctious, whiny and tantrum-throwing children happen!

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  20. I put the zoo on my "no freakin way" list recently. Not until he can pay attention, hold my hand and stop running off like it's prison break.

    You are very brave to try this zoo thing. I think we lasted about an hour as well. The longest hour in recent memory.

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  21. Oh nooo. Never happened to me. Don't know what you are talking about.
    *insert eye rolling*

    We've been having plenty of those days around here lately. Ugh.

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  22. Sounds like you need a beer and the kids need a nap!

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  23. I am just now starting to see glimpses of toddler attitude, so I have no advice for you here.

    Still I often wonder why I have the devil spawn baby while everyone else has the sweet angel baby. Then I realize that I am only seeing these people for about 15 seconds and I probably just caught the best 15 seconds of their baby's life. Or at least that's what I tell myself... =)

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  24. Right now, I am hiding out from my monster. I don't know what happened. We fed him. Napped him. Watered him.

    And he's still clingy mcmonster boy . . . what the hey? Did I sign up for this.

    Dang it. I did.

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  25. As the mother of a two and four-year-old, I hear you 100%.

    Today, my two-year-old told me that 1) I was a bad mama; and 2) She didn't love me; and 3) I had ugly eyes.

    So...I'm hearing you sister.

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  26. you can sell your kids on ebay?!?!?!? off to set up an account!

    okay, just kidding, before CPS starts stalking my blog. i have days like that too, when i think it is a good thing there are people watching...

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  27. My kids are PERFECT. I have NO IDEA what you are talking about.

    Shoot. I have not a lying bone in my body. I tried to sell them on ebay, but the handling costs were hefty.

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  28. The more fun the family activity is supposed to be, the worse mine act. But let me drag them around the grocery store for an hour and they're perfectly okay.

    I'm so with you on the Ebay sale.

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  29. No, you are not the only one. :) Hang in there.

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  30. Don't ever let them outnumber the two of you. Then you're REALLY screwed!

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  31. All of our kids are monsters! I've been there.

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  32. Maybe it's the weather. Mine, too, have been auditioning for the documentary you were filming (hahaha). Especially my 4 year old. With 3 I really am outnumbered but there's always one that's behaving and will be sure to point it out. "Mommy, I not hitting you."

    Hang in there. You are obviously not alone!

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  33. Everyone is really not having a better day at the zoo. They are faking. And you're more honest about it. That's all.

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  34. Oh my gosh, you are SO not the only one. Mine isn't too bad most of the time, but when he decides to go bad, he GOES BAD.

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  35. I feel ya. I've been there many times and it's always in a public place where everyone else and their well-behaved children can see us.

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  36. You are not the only one. I have one of those sweet adorable little monsters sleeping upstairs right now. She can never walk. She always wants to be carried. Even at the grocery store, when I'm alone, even when we have a cart. Drives me mad. Carry a two year old, grocery shop and push a cart... not my idea of a good time. We go over and over how she is a big girl and either needs to walk or ride in the cart. It never works.

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  37. I am so sorry for your really horrible no good rotten day. hugs!

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  38. I hate those days! Why is it that it always plays out in public? We had to drag Courtney out of Sea World kicking and screaming a couple of weeks ago. It happens!

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  39. I have those days. I think we all do! OR at least I hope so!

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