What a Lovely P*ssy You Are

I have partied on bar tops in Rome with men named Alessandro and Matteo. I have blown the doors off of many a joint in Chicago as well. Thing of it is...those were my young single days. Truth of it is...I always have been a bit of a prude. A fun prude...but still a prude (I blame the Catholic Italian in me;P)

I tell you this so you understand, at least a bit, that's just the way I am.

Miss Peach and The Little Man LOVE when I read The Owl and the Pussycat. You know we have a monster cat in our house. When Miss Peach was a little baby, one of the first words she said was "ti ti". That meant "cat". I think she would hear me say "kitty kitty kitty" to Smokey and could only make out the "ti ti". Hence, in our house "ti ti" means "kitty kitty".

Since I am such a prude, whenever I read The Owl and the Pussycat to the kiddos, I replace all the "Pussy" with "Ti Ti"

The Book: "Oh lovely Pussy,
Oh Pussy my love..."

Me: "Oh lovely Ti Ti,
Oh Ti Ti my love..."

Get it? I know...I'm nuts:)

Flash forward to today...Kiddos are in the stroller, and I'm pushing them to the health club.

Miss Peach: "Mommy, Ti Ti is a Pussy."

Me: "No, Ti Ti is a Kitty Cat."

Miss Peach: "Some people call Ti Ti's Pussy. Like in the Owl and the Pussycat."

Me: "Well...Mommy reads it The Owl and the Ti Ti cat."

Miss Peach: "The book says Pussy...I like Pussy!'

The Little Man: "I like Pussy too!"

Me: "OK, well...we're not going to say that word."

Miss Peach: "What word? Pussy. I like Pussy!"

The Little Man: "I like Pussy too!"

Me: (big sigh) "Let's not say that word. Let's say Ti Ti."

Miss Peach: "But I like Pussy!"

The Little Man: "I like Pussy too!"

....and scene.

Damn them for learning to read!:P (I know, crazy Google coming my way)

32 comments

  1. HA HA HA HA! I love it!

    I need to write up a post on it, but we decided to teach our 4yo the proper name for male genitalia. We should have figured that he'd in turn teach the word to his 2yo brother. And we should have expected that said 2yo would find the quiet library the PERFECT place to chant the word at the top of his lungs.

    Ah...good times...good times...

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  2. Oh NOOOOO!!! That book never made it more than a day in my house. I hate THAT WORD. And it is said SO MUCH in that book.

    "I LIKE PUSSY!" Just what every mother wants her toddlers to scream...

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  3. BWHAHAHA!!! I was never terribly comfortable with that story, either. It didn't bug me when I was a kid, but now that I *know* what I know, it's an uncomfortable read...

    Oh, and I want to know how many people you passed on the street who were privy to this conversation...

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  4. ha! love it. was anyone in earshot for that conversation??

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  5. So? In our house, we call it a "china" because my older daughters started calling it that. I don't know why. Everyone knows the correct terminology and stuff, but they call all it china. Imagine the new meaning everyday conversations take on: "On Christmas will use the special china." "When we were in France, we saw Joan of Arc's china in a museum." Etc.

    Funny post, yo.

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  6. I've just spat a perfectly good mouthful of mojito out laughing at that!! Got to love children!! Have a great weekend!!

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  7. hahaha I loved little man's echo of big sister! Never read that book!

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  8. That's hilarious. I think I'd be giggling down the sidewalk while trying to be all serious saying "we don't say pussy."

    (But I have the mouth of a trucker.)

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  9. Out of the mouths of babes...they can embarrass you without even trying!

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  10. oh my god. Laughing so hard over here.

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  11. I was laughing out loud reading this!! I would have died if my daughter said that!

    When I was in high school, we visited England with my grandparents to visit my grandma's family. (She was born and raised there.) We went to visit her sister and her granddaughter, who had her cat doll with her. My great aunt must have asked her about her "little p*ssy" 15 times. My sister and I could hardly keep it in, we were laughing so hard.

    I hate that word as relates to women, but damn do I get a kick out of it's more *innocent* use.

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  12. OH my GOD, seriously, funniest thing I've read in a while! Hahahahahaha... I hear ya, though. "I like pussy!" OMG! Oh, no... haha... I was reading my son Amelia Bedelia the other night and I was laughing inside at this part: "Mrs. Rogers opened her mouth to tell Amelia Bedelia she was fired but Mr. Rogers put something so good in her mouth she forgot what she was going to say" Or something like that. Dirty mind, I know.

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  13. I think I peed my pants!!!!! Too funny!

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  14. Snort.

    When I was a kid, my father had a boat called the Sea Pussy. I had no idea. Later, his next boat was the Sea Beaver. Lordy.

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  15. I might be laughing a little too hard at this.
    remind me to tell you why later ;-)

    loves so much

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  16. LMAO.. Ooo girl that's hysterical! The alternative isn't much better, sounds like you're talking about boobs..lol I would die if Meg said that. :-)

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  17. HAHAHAHAHAHA That was so funny. "Ti Ti" isn't all that much better is it?

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  18. Well, that will teach you not to be such a prude! LOL!!

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  19. Oh, that has me laughing out loud. Thankgoodness my girls aren't around to ask me what I'm laughing about. I'm a bit of a prude too!

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  20. I had to click through from my Nap Warden email subscription to leave a comment on this one because holy shit - I was laughing the whole way through. I would never ever label you a prude -especially AFTER meeting you! You were totally dancing on table tops at the Mama Pop party so who would have thought you would have such a hard time saying uh, pussy??? You crack me up!!

    Love it.

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  21. oy. vey. to that.
    and oy vey to the google searches and the people that they will bring you!!
    :)
    xo

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  22. When I was a child, we had a family cat. Named Pussy. Not Pussycat. Just Pussy. Cut to kids in the yard, screaming at the top of their lungs, "Here Pussy, Pussy, Pussy!"

    I do not know how my mother survived. But my dad? Thought he was pretty funny.

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  23. bwahahahahahahahahahahaa...

    *gasp choke wheeze cough*

    bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaa...

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  24. Wait til they learn what it really means lol... funny

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  25. See you arent the only one who cannot stand that word! I do not like it either, and I think I banned that book from the house. Its funny though, cuz I would tell my son who is now 17 about how he would say improper words at the wrong time. We lived in Sicily, and their word for poop was caca.. omg I hated that word, and right in the middle of the commissary, he would squat down and say mama im going caca OMG!

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  26. Okay I'm imagining the looks that you are getting by people that could have been passing by. I'm cracking up!

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  27. LOL that conversation was fabulous! :) thanks for sharing.

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  28. Love it... We would be so bored without our children to entertain us, wouldn't we?

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