Perfect?

Ugh...I'm tired. It is hard being a Mom to two toddlers, and training for a marathon! Last week Husband didn't make it home before bedtime at all. I don't know if this week is going to shape up to be the same, but I did have to take the kiddos on my 4 mile run tonight...and it kicked my a**! I have three months to get this "qualify for Boston" train on the tracks, and right now I'm not feeling it. I am so pi**ed off about having to start with another training program. I just feel behind the eight ball...and I don't like it. I really hope Thursday's training run works out well. Keep your fingers crossed.
I'm also a bit urked with Husband. It's like he came home wanting to push me, or pick a fight. I don't want to go into details since it really is just pointless stuff. Really, nothing of any significance. Currently, I am tuning him out (watching Nashville Star, lame I know). He's in the other room on his computer, while I'm in here blogging to you. It just gets hard sometimes...he works all day and then comes home. Let's just say, I'm not June Cleaver...I get wiped out. I don't have dinner on the table, or the house all picked up. Sometimes I do, but not all the time. No, he doesn't expect it, maybe I expect it of myself a little bit. Don't you just feel like we are in a time where the rules of the past don't apply? Seriously, when does my day end? I know I'm lucky...Husband is a really great father and usually extremely supportive of me. I'm just mad at him right now...it's not supposed to be perfect all the time...is it?

27 comments

  1. NO it is not perfect all the time. your post hit home, my hubby is home late most of the time, but i am not june cleaver, i don't have dinner for him most of the time. he is great, but sometimes i feel like we just don't talk until the weekend....i feel like it is work to hang out and i hate that.

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  2. You are not alone, sister! I don't have the whole training for a marathon thang going on, but I do have the two toddlers and the constantly working husband . . . and I hate to complain about his absence, because it is the reason I can stay at home with the kids, but it does get old sometimes. I agree with Feener . . . it is hard to hang out with him sometimes - I get so used to being alone and doing everything myself, that he just seems to be in my way all the time. You don't have to be perfect! (And you can steal the #1 rule at our house: if you aren't home for the dinner I make, you are responsible for making your own meal - I am not a short-order cook!)

    (Formerly Driving With the Brakes On - I needed a fresh start!)

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  3. Perfect? What's that? There is no such thing. Except for in movies, maybe. But that is fake. This is real life. Real life is hard. And you get mad at each other, and annoyed and pissed, but you keep coming back. Keep finding your way back to each other and that is what makes life even better than a movie.
    Hang in there!

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  4. I think it gets "easier" when your kids are older and not so demanding. It is physically AND emotionally exhausting! After I had my first daughter my husband was launching his business and working CONSTANTLY. He would come home late, exhausted and I would be wound up and exhausted from being home with a baby (and I was also working but getting home at a reasonable hour.) It was tough. Even when I was home after our second daughter I still didn't find my June Cleaver gene. ;)

    Hang in there! Sounds like you too need a night out...even just quiet dinner and some wine. Lots of wine!

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  5. I'd love to know what "perfect" is supposed to look like...

    Mad at your husband? For this one moment I'm not... but I spent the last 3 years with a husband gone almost 50% of the time... oh, I can SO feel your pain.

    Good luck in the motivation department. I'm feeling some fat thighs coming on - so if you can spare any motivation, I'll take one lump... maybe two.

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  6. I think "perfect" parenting and marriages are the stuff of good marketing. Do the best you can every day.

    And I agree with Jamie, it gets much easier when they are older. Go to bed mad (sometimes it's better than an all out argument) but talk it out then make up. Hang in there!

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  7. Being (and staying) married is hard work - especially when you add kids to the mix.
    Is it possible for you to hire a babysitter once a day so you can run alone??? Just for a few hours? Of course, look at who's talking - our oldest is almost 4 and we don't have a babysitter outside of grandma...

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  8. No, and no matter how stressful their day job is, they'll never understand the constant demands of being home with babies/toddlers.

    But it's prob hard when it feels like we have the trump card to any stressful day they have.

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  9. Nope, not perfect all the time. That is for dang sure!

    But for me, my husband and I both work full time. So I'm not "expected" to do all of that. Nor would I. Because I too, am NOT a June Cleaver.

    Maybe you should take a run to clear your head?

    Good Luck!

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  10. Don't worry. Nobody needs to be perfect all the time (or any of the time). We're just all human. I can't even begin to imagine how hard it must be with 2 toddlers.

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  11. life stinks a lot, I think. Sorry you are in a slump.. The training will get better.. stick with it because you love it!

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  12. You are still my hero with the marathon and two toddlers.

    Who is June Cleaver "REALLY" why are women expected to the home makers. It bother when I hear my mother-in-law spout out things like "hmmm this is good chicken-n-rice. did it come from a box". Ok like I only cook things that come from a box pre-made. Kiss my qrits flo I'm not yo mama. If that is what I'm suppose to do for my hubby well he better be finding him a June Cleaver.

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  13. Hang in there. The new June Cleaver is the real Bree Van DeCamp. And look how screwed up she REALLY is! Having toddlers is tough enough. Having a husband that doesn't pull his weight(for whatever reason) can be exhausting. I'm convinced the only people who truly understand how exhausting it is to be a stay at home mom are stay at home moms. I get it.

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  14. Wow! Did I write this?

    I totally get where you are coming from. It gets a little easier when they are older, but not much. Now I'm juggling carpool and homework and other crap in addition to the house stuff. And sometimes? It's a pick two kind of day. You know? I can do the outside errands, clean the house/do laundry, or cook dinner. Pick two.

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  15. anglophilefootballfanatic.comJune 24, 2008 at 2:04 PM

    Nothing is ever perfect all the time. If it were, we'd lose our appreciation.

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  16. It's never perfect all the time - trust me...

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  17. PERFECT???What is that...perfect is a thing of books and movies...what is perfect but what you are feeling. I HEAR YOU!!! Here's a motivation for you!! I CAN'T BELIEVE you still RUN thru all of this is it admirable!!! Come visit me, I've been mia for a while, but back..and remember you are NOT alone, we all have felt this before...you are perfect!!!
    visit http://www.cafemommy.blogspot.com

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  18. I hope not! If it is, then my husband and I are screwed.

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  19. Why my hubby and I have a perfect marriage, I can offer you advice anytime! LOL...

    My hubby just took a couple of days off and by the second day, I was thinking, was this my idea?

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  20. Nope can't be perfect all the time. But boy wouldn't be nice. I feel your pain Hubby is out of town all week so I am doing duty as mom, housekeeper, cook and business executive. So I feel your pain!!! You comment about him on his computer and you on yours made me laugh because hubby and I do the same thing sometimes at night.

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  21. June Cleaver gets the curse you aquascum of angst fist shake. Toddlers are mini trashing machines - period. So if the guys are willing to roll up their sleeves and help shovel the dishes out of the sink perfect ain't gonna happen.

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  22. I have never met any guy that I liked every day! janet

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  23. My husband works long hours and right now his work environment sucks and that follows him home. He rarely complains that the house is a WRECK or that we have NO food but he will say/do things just to piss me off. We've been married for 10 years and it is normal but it does suck. Hope it gets better soon!

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  24. oh, I am so with you on this one! my hubby travels all the time and calls me to whine about how tired he is and how late he stayed out to dinner, etc. He then gets annoyed that I don't really seem to care that he got to sleep all night long or use the bathroom by himself!

    Why can't men understand that WE NEVER GET OFF DUTY!? Ugh.

    I don't know how the june cleaver's did it!

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  25. AMEN. I'm reading "Happily Married With Kids - It's not just a fairy tale" and learning this is extremely common at this age (kids' age). Hopefully it gets better. Until then, it's comforting to be in good company.

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  26. The irony of this post is enormous and very timely. My husband JUST walked in the door after going to the gym this morning, working today, and THEN going back to the gym. It's 6:30 and he just said he's taking the dog for a walk.

    I got a bit peeved. Like, how about STAYING with your kids a bit?

    He got a little peeved. like, you think I WANT to do these chores? They just need doing.

    Anyways, my point is, I GET YOU. Their good men, just a little clueless sometimes?!

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  27. I never made it to the full marathon, just a half. Have you done one before? Good luck!

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