Comments on The Chronicles of a SAHM: More Practice...and Nuts?

I am the queen of trying something on and then put...

2008-04-28T06:16:00.000-05:00

I am the queen of trying something on and then putting it back on the rack. Can't remember the last time I bought anything more than a couple of pairs of u/wear (of the cheap cotton variety!). Re the working thing, this is why I started doing Family Daycare from home. It is tiring, and sometimes frustrating, but I do get to earn some money and still stay at home with Naomi. We will see how long it lasts!

Yeah, I've been trying to come up with more ways t...

2008-04-26T19:29:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I've been trying to come up with more ways to make money... one virtual assistant client and a little bit of paid blogging isn't enough for us. Now, I'm fighting the depression and even considered giving up blogging... it's a long story that I won't bug you with hehe.

Oh and I do NOT spend money on myself... never have... I can't handle the guilt trip I put on myself.

Yep, you are nuts. But that doesn't stop me eithe...

2008-04-24T16:12:00.000-05:00

Yep, you are nuts. But that doesn't stop me either from picking up some side business for the adult conversation. At this point it is more about the creative process for me then the money which seems to help me get through a hard mommy day.

There really is no end to your talents. As we say ...

2008-04-22T18:38:00.000-05:00

There really is no end to your talents. As we say Down Under, good on ya.

Belive in yourself, believe in your own ability and believe in your creativity.

If ever you falter, let me know

How do I handle it? Well, that was the deal we ma...

2008-04-22T15:01:00.000-05:00

How do I handle it? Well, that was the deal we made. He works and I get to stay home with the kids. We both thought it was for the best PLUS if I did work the majority of my income would go to daycare for three kids. It just made sense to stay home. Of course, I want to too so that helps.

When the kids are all in school full time I will go back to work. My income will go towards college tuition for them, REAL vacations for the family. Also I'm a few years younger than my husband so when he retires I'll still be working.

Even though I don't contribute financially, I contribute my time and effort 24/7. So I don't think twice about spending a little money here and there.

I'm a teacher. I bring in the big bucks already. H...

2008-04-22T12:57:00.000-05:00

I'm a teacher. I bring in the big bucks already. Haaaaaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaa! Love your bug!

Oh, and let me know if you need help saving for we...

2008-04-21T16:20:00.000-05:00

Oh, and let me know if you need help saving for web. You want to clip it to the artboard - and set artboard to size you want.

I think you're wise. I can understand not wanting...

2008-04-21T16:10:00.000-05:00

I think you're wise. I can understand not wanting to touch that money. I never made a lot of money, so for me, the little pittance I'm making designing is a lot of fun! But I totally understand how you must feel. I think I'd feel the same way, if I had been paying my own way, so to speak.

That said, cut yourself a break every once in a while. Splurge a little. :-)

I think your question is why I still work, I am no...

2008-04-21T11:22:00.000-05:00

I think your question is why I still work, I am not sure I could handle not making my own money. Sad huh?

Love the drawings, you are really good with it. A...

2008-04-21T07:51:00.000-05:00

Love the drawings, you are really good with it. As for the money thing, I feel the exact same way you do. Which is the main reason I still work. I NEED to contribute. Otherwise I would feel totally guilty when I spend, even if its on the kids. But then there are times when I would totally walk away from job for them so its a tough trade-off.

I think about that every day. I wish I could start...

2008-04-21T06:12:00.000-05:00

I think about that every day. I wish I could start some little business....but what? Before I had Aaron, I had already quit my job for a couple of years but I was still earning money from home. Trading online! But these days, there are too many distractions for that.

So, I comfort myself by saying that this IS my job. And by doing this, it allows my husband the ability to go out to earn the money. So...actually, I'm indirectly earning it by allowing him time off from his job at home :).

It works some days but not others....

You're only a little nuts. :) Like me.

I...

2008-04-20T21:46:00.000-05:00

You're only a little nuts. :) Like me.

I know that guilt you speak of (guilty here too) but you have a REALLY important job with benefits!

Darlin', you need to spend an afternoon with me so...

2008-04-20T20:44:00.000-05:00

Darlin', you need to spend an afternoon with me so that I can set you straight. We'll spend the first ten minutes with me drilling into your head the VALUE (priceless) of your (selfless and saintly) work as a SAHM. The we'll spend the rest of the afternoon shopping.

FUnny that you should post this.. I was just think...

2008-04-20T15:28:00.000-05:00

FUnny that you should post this.. I was just thinking about this. I really enjoyed my work (and income) before I was a mother, then in the first year of my child's life, I had a little mortgage business that actually did pretty well. I have since stopped doing that and am feeling really weirda nd dependent. I will be interested to read what some of your readers have to say...

I had a hard time with this too, but then began to...

2008-04-20T11:37:00.000-05:00

I had a hard time with this too, but then began to think about the fact that if I did work and had 2 kids in day care... between paying for day care and the gas to drive to and from work, well I wouldn't make anything anyway

so in essence I'm probably saving us money by not working

I think I kinda agree with both of you. You worke...

2008-04-20T10:36:00.000-05:00

I think I kinda agree with both of you. You worked hard to give yourself the luxury of being home. Your new job deserves an income just as much as the old one. You should actually "pay" yourself some of hubby's salary. I know I do. My job involves more hours with less perks. Just think of Nap Designs as a added bonus.

"I just feel like I am in this totally weird money...

2008-04-20T09:00:00.000-05:00

"I just feel like I am in this totally weird money limbo land. "

I am so with you! Thus my biggest struggle with becoming a SAHM. I wouldn't give up being with J for ANYTHING, but the thought of not making money (since I worked since I was 14) is completely freaking me out. My hubby says I'm nuts, too. And, even friends don't get why I worry.

I know this is the most important job --- I get it already. It just isn't about that.

I do think you should take great pride in the designs biz and the fact that you are learning a new technology (that is an awesome illustration--btw). Consider what you are doing as working toward becoming a successful WAHM . . . who just happens to make a lot of $$$.

I hope to be there one day, too . . .

Even though I wouldn't give up staying home with m...

2008-04-20T08:08:00.000-05:00

Even though I wouldn't give up staying home with my kids for anything, and now because of health reasons I can't get a job, and even though we still have a nicely comfortable income, I still have trouble spending money because I'm not actively earning it.

It does help to add up all the costs I'd have if I were working--not just the daycare, but a business wardrobe (and the attendant dry cleaning) and hairstyling, etc., lunches, extra gas and miles on the car, the cost of eating out more often... there are a lot of hidden costs to working, especially when the kids are small.

And of course reminding yourself why you're staying home--that you're doing something you think is valuable, therefore, you shouldn't feel bad about spending money.

Now if I could just remember that myself. :)

ooooh i have such a hard time with it. i worked fo...

2008-04-20T08:03:00.000-05:00

ooooh i have such a hard time with it. i worked for 13 years and was making good money. i want to be a sahm, but i have a very hard time with the fact that i don't make any money and all i do is SPEND it. every day i spend money and it kills me. my hubby is great about it and doesn't feel any problems, it is my own issue.

I like what mama bird said. But, it is hard. It's ...

2008-04-20T00:45:00.000-05:00

I like what mama bird said. But, it is hard. It's really been bugging me lately. And it isn't that I feel bad for spending money, it's just that I don't like feeling like I should answer for it (even though my husband doesn't ask that, for the most part).

So,I don't have any answers. But I'll be curious to read the other comments as they come in.

Have fun with Illustrator!

I think about how much it would cost to pay for a ...

2008-04-19T22:48:00.000-05:00

I think about how much it would cost to pay for a full-time nanny or full-time day care if I was working.

And then I go buy myself a cute top and sassy shoes.

i like your drawing! cool.